We love to go to Ikea. There’s my dirty little confession. We love the meatballs and the girls love to play at the kids area. Plus, it’s just fun to get lost in that place. And I’m a huge fan of how kid friendly their bathrooms are – they have stools and low sinks and free diapers! Which I actually had to use once when Moira was a baby and she had THE most incredible blowout (her fourth that day) and I had neglected to restock the diaper bag.
Anyhoo, we were at Ikea a few months back doing our “day at Ikea” thing and the girls and I were in the bathroom. Kenna was propped up on the kid’s stool by the kid’s sink washing her hands and the changing table happened to be right next to it. While she’s standing there a mom and baby came over to change the baby’s diaper. And of course this was totally fascinating to Kenna who got completely distracted and just openly watched. The mom didn’t seem to mind so I didn’t either.
As soon as the mom popped the diaper off, Kenna’s face totally changed. She was absolutely staring at the little boy. Then she turned to me (loudly) and said “why’s he got a hot dog in his pants??”
I told her that little boys were different than little girls because they had penises instead of vaginas. Didn’t sink in too well because she still looked puzzled and continued to stare.
Then she turned back to me and asked “did my hot dog fall off when I was a baby?”
Categories: Uncategorized
Moira’s school is conducting parent-teacher conferences this week which results in three (yes, three!) days of early release for the kids. Yesterday afternoon I was at school picking up Moira and a little buddy she had over for a playdate. As we were walking towards the sidewalk, their teacher walks by and says “Goodbye! I’m so jealous that you get to go home and play and I have to stay and work!”
Moira turns and looks at her and says (in the most WTF voice I’ve ever heard out of her): “Well, you’re getting paid money and we aren’t!”
I snorted and her teacher looked shocked. It was slightly rude, very hilarious, and totally out of character for her. Gotta admit, I loved it.
Categories: Kiddos · Moira
Just wanted to post a shot of The Beast (aka Maia)…she’s lucky she’s so darn cute or she’d be sent to a glue factory by now. I won’t get into all the things she’s destroyed so far because she’s not done yet I’m sure. Suffice it to say – she’s awfully adorable.
Oh – the cone is because she chewed an actual hole in her stomach. One of the stitches for her spay didn’t dissolve completely and seemed to work its way to the surface, and Maia sped up its removal from her body with her teeth. Even though her mix includes border collie she doesn’t seem to have gotten the brains.
But we love her anyway.
Categories: Uncategorized
On Sunday, Kenna was in fine form bossing all of us around. Her request for breakfast went something like this: “Mom, make me breakfast.” When I didn’t respond – it was simply the same request louder and louder and louder. I happened to be on the phone with her Grandma and Grandpa at the time. When Grandma heard her “request” – her comment was that she sounded like a little dictator.
I went to share this little funny with Alan (who was still lazing around in bed) and Kenna came in to say hi. When she heard what Grandma had called her she said “I’m not a tater!” When we laughed, she got even more indignant and said “I’m NOT a tater tot!!”
Whatever you say my little Tater Tot!
Categories: Kenna · Kiddos
December 26, 2009 · 1 Comment
We’re walking around the neighborhood looking at Christmas lights on Christmas Eve. Moira and Kenna were getting to that tired/wild/excited part of the night (plus the Christmas Eve factor) and were running in front of us checking out each and every house and its decorations. Moira was keeping up a running commentary on what she saw on each lawn.
Moira: “And this one has a reindeer, lights, Santa, some presents, oh – there’s a penguin and some trees.”
Me: “Are you going to give us a blow-by-blow of each house silly girl?”
Moira: “I like to give a blow.”
Robin (while snorting): “It’s blow-BY-blow.”
Moira: “I like just blow.”
Categories: Kiddos · Moira
While riding in the car a few afternoons back:
Moira (in full indignant outrage mode): “MOM! Kenna keeps commanding me!!”
Categories: Kiddos · Moira
November 18, 2009 · 1 Comment
Let me start off with two pieces of random information that are relevant to this quote.
1. Moira receives a weekly allowance. We debated about how to do it, when to do it, and how to explain it to her. Ultimately we quit debating and just did it. Much like many decisions in parenthood, we wanted to make sure we did the best we could by our kids. And since Moira is the oldest, she’s also the guinea pig. Long story short – she receives her age X $1 per week with no strings attached. Presently her allowance is $6 a week. Seems like a lot to old folks like me, but the point of her receiving allowance is to help her begin to understand how money works, how to save it, how to spend it, etc. If her allowance was so small she could do nothing with it (thanks inflation!), then really what was the point?
2. Moira has Citizen of The Household chores. She does these weekly because she is a member of the family. See – you thought we just gave her allowance and expected nothing in return eh? We opted not to tie the two directly mostly because I didn’t want to hear “That’s okay – I have enough money – I don’t want to do my chores this week.” She’s smart like that. The newest chore in Moira’s repertoire is emptying the dishwasher. This was Alan’s bright idea…I cringed thinking she was too young and having visions of shattered ceramic ware lying on our ceramic tile floor (trust me – when those babies break – they shatter spectacularly). I was dead wrong. Not only is she careful and attentive – she loves it!
The other night Alan let her know that the dishwasher was clean and ready to be emptied. He also mentioned that we owed her allowance and did she want it then or later?
Her exuberant response was this: “You mean I get my allowance AND I get to empty the dishwasher??” (said with a HUGE smile plastered on her face)
Even typing the words now – I think that has got to be the best thing to have ever come out of her mouth. Well, maybe besides “I love you Mommy!”
Categories: Kiddos · Moira
November 12, 2009 · 1 Comment
We wanted the girls to have lots of time to adjust to having a new brother or sister so we’ve shared with them that Mommy is expecting a baby. Sadly enough, my stomach is already starting to pooch so Kenna has been noticing. She keeps informing me that my belly is “fat”.
The other day Kenna was inspecting my belly and a puzzled look crossed her face. Now keep in mind that she is three and her six-year old sister hasn’t even thought of these questions yet (or at least hasn’t asked them yet).
Kenna points to my belly button and says “the baby come out dere?”
I giggled and said that no, the baby would come out of my vagina. She got the most disgusted look on her face and said “Outta your ‘gina? That’s just gwoss.”
I asked her why it was gross and she said “cause that’s where poop comes out”. I laughed out loud and told her that poop comes out your anus which is different than your vagina.
Side note: We try really hard to use correct terms rather than silly made-up stuff like vah-jay-jay. I read this big study on child molesters where several convicted pedophiles revealed that kids who use proper terminology are bad targets. I guess if the parents are open enough to use the right terms, they are open enough to talk about sex with their kids and therefore they are more likely to get caught. It seriously took some practice when Moira was little. I think Alan giggled every single time he said vagina for the first six months of her life. Luckily she doesn’t remember that time at all. Bonus!
Kenna just shook her head and said “Nope, that’s where poop comes out. Gwoss!”
Can’t wait to see her reaction to meconium poops. You ain’t seen nothing yet kid!
Categories: Uncategorized
One of the best things about living in AZ is the multitude of wildlife. A few weeks back, we got home from picking Kenna up at preschool. One of our neighbor boys had chipped four of his teeth so he came with us to wait for his mom to take him to the dentist. We were sitting in our kitchen (which overlooks the backyard) and he asked if that was a frog in the pool.
Since we’ve had little tiny frogs back there before, I said “oh probably”. Then we went to investigate.
Boy were we surprised when this was what was waiting for us….
It was the biggest freaking toad I’ve ever seen! I’m guessing he/she weighed close to a pound and a half.
After a little research on the internet – we determined it was a Desert Sonoran Toad. Which also happens to be highly poisonous to dogs.
Gulp. Glad we found it first.
The mystery still remains of why it was in our pool at that particular moment (they usually come out during monsoon season which it isn’t). We had quite a time catching the darn thing so we could take it elsewhere. Our pool net proved to be a great jumping off point for him. What finally worked was a big bucket.
He hung out in the bucket until Moira got home from school. We showed him off, then took him to a wash and released him there…into the mud we created.
Good luck Mr. Toad! Hope you’re not dead.
Categories: Living the Dream
We’re eating dinner and talking about seeds that are in some fruits. Moira is eating purple grapes that claim to be seedless. She says that they have seeds in them. Alan tries one to see if the seeds are big enough to detect. Then we explain to Moira that all seedless fruits actually have seeds, they are just too small to taste or feel with your tongue.
Alan goes on to say that you just poop the seeds out. Jokingly I say “they only turn into plants sometimes”.
Moira immediately turns to me and says “it will if you eat dirt.”
Categories: Kiddos · Moira
