Category Archives: Moira

We’re eating dinner and talking about seeds that are in some fruits. Moira is eating purple grapes that claim to be seedless. She says that they have seeds in them. Alan tries one to see if the seeds are big enough to detect. Then we explain to Moira that all seedless fruits actually have seeds, they are just too small to taste or feel with your tongue.

Alan goes on to say that you just poop the seeds out. Jokingly I say “they only turn into plants sometimes”.

Moira immediately turns to me and says “it will if you eat dirt.”

Moira got her ears pierced this last weekend. It suddenly became the big thing at school and Moira (who has infinite style) realized it was another opportunity for demonstration of said style. Shazam!

So she asked and we discussed and then ultimately agreed. I made her watch a video on aftercare and warned her that it would hurt. Her response: “I know Mom!”

To be fair – she is my kid who barely cried for immunizations. Her pain threshold seems to be pretty high. And sure enough – while she sat there in “the chair” and they punched holes in her ears, she didn’t even bat an eye.

She’s super proud of herself and seems downright enchanted that she actually has earrings IN her ears!

While we were walking back through the mall to return to our car – she walked up next to me, grabbed my hand, and smiled up at me. And it struck me that she won’t always look up at me like that. She won’t even want to walk near me, let alone hold my hand.

And my heart hurt just a little bit.

Who knew parenting would be such a bittersweet experience? I had plenty of folks regaling me with tales of sleep deprivation, dirty diapers, and picky eating. But not one single person mentioned that for every step your child takes forward you’re both deliriously proud and a little sad. Because you’ll never be there again and kids really do grow up too fast.

It sucks when cliches are true.

True to her word, Moira patiently lets me clean her ears the required three times daily. And at least once a day, she proudly says: “I can’t believe I pierced my ears!”

I can’t wait to see what earrings she picks out when she’s allowed to remove the piercing studs.

Sparkly purple dolphins anyone?

Moira and Kenna are both taking a once-a-week dance class through our local Parks and Rec. The classes are located in one of the buildings at a community park that’s close (but not super close) to our house. Yesterday we headed down a bit early and brought a picnic dinner. The park has a really great playground in addition to about a million miles of grassy play area (which is a big deal in Arizona!) Our thought was to eat dinner and play, then have Alan and Moira head over to dance class while Kenna and I kept playing.

On the drive down, Moira loudly asked me if she could ask a question. I said yes and she paused. Alan and I laughed because the look on her face combined with the waiting period for the question to pop out was pretty substantial. She really seemed to be processing something deep so I couldn’t wait to hear what this was all about.

Finally she looks up at me and says:

“Mom, why they be called artichokes? They don’t choke anything.”

I snorted and started laughing – loudly. Alan chuckled. We weren’t talking about anything related to artichokes, vegetables, or even food for that matter. And why did my child suddenly sound Jamaican? We’ll never know.

Sadly we had no good answer for her – why the heck ARE they called artichokes?

You thought I was introducing a new rock band didn’t you? I think it’s got potential…maybe the teenage version of Moira will become the lead singer of her own band.

But what I meant was the sleepover! The promised details of said insane parenting moment! WOOT!

But get this…it was unbelievably easy. We must have invited the nicest girls ever because aside from the usual giggly little girl stuff (otherwise known as giggling to a dangerously late hour for six and seven year olds) – it was a piece of cake.

We kicked things off with a pinata, then let them play followed in short order with pizza. After dinner each girl used fabric markers to design her own pillowcase to take home. Then there was some giggling. Actually a lot of giggling. We attempted a movie with popcorn at some point – it didn’t last long. One big success was those little glow sticks you get at Halloween. They friggin loved em!

Around 9:30pm, Alan set up Operation Bedtime. He had the girls filing into the bathrooms for teethbrushing and potty stops with military precision. It was awesome! Those are the times when I am struck with how great a dad he really is. After that was over, Alan read the girls a bedtime story en masse and we shut the lights off.

A small skirmish broke out around 10pm with one set of girls wanting to go to sleep and another group who had the giggles to an extent that made it impossible for the first group to fall asleep. When I say skirmish I mean tattling of course. Alan installed a rope of Christmas lights to light the way to the bathroom and we shushed the group multiple times.

There was one small spell of “I’m scared and I want my mommy!” by one of the first-timers. I offered to call home and deliver her back to her mom. Her response? “I don’t want to go home – I want my mom to come here!” Eventually it passed and she passed out. When she woke up the next morning you know what she said? “I did it!” Cracked me up.

The hold-outs finally crashed at 11:30pm, but the entire group was up promptly at 6am wanting pancakes. So we cooked and served and they ate surprising quantities for such small girlies.

Everyone was picked up by 10am and the house was strangely quiet for the rest of the day.

I talked to one of the moms the following Monday at school and she told me when her daughter got home she had pronounced the event the “best party EVER!”

Once the girls had all gone – Moira began planning next year’s event. I guess it was a success. LOL!

Alan is big into making “fancy drinks” right now…usually something in the blender with fruit, honey, yogurt, etc. Sort of like smoothie du jour in our house most days. At lunch today he crafted some pretty fabulous strawberry lemonade. Moira usually digs having a treat when she gets home from school.

Alan picked Moira up from school and let her know that he had a special treat waiting for her at home.

Her response?

“I know what it is – it’s a pinata colado!”

We’re outside swimming over the weekend. Alan and I were chatting while the girls splashed and swam around. Moira suddenly comes running up and says “Mom, I can do a push-up – WATCH!”

It struck me as funny that she suddenly had the urge to do a push-up so I jokingly said “Drop and give me twenty!”

She looks at me in all seriousness and says “how about two?”

This weekend we’re hosting Moira’s 6th birthday party. And it’s a slumber party. For six girls between the age of 6 and 7, not including my own two. That makes EIGHT little screaming giggly girls grand total. Yikes!

What in the hell was I thinking when I agreed to this?

Tonight’s tasks include shopping for party supplies, rearranging the furniture to accommodate sleeping bag grand central, filling the pinata, and baking the cake. And I think I need some wine – you know for therapeutic reasons. Ha!

I’ll definitely post a blow-by-blow of the whole experience. Of the six kids coming over – it’s the first slumber party for four of them. I’m curious to see if I have to make any 2am phone calls for homesick kids.

Moira is learning about some new shapes at school. They’re up to hexagons, pentagons, trapezoids and the like. Her homework the other night required her to draw several of them to reinforce what they’d done in school that day.

She and Alan were talking about which shapes she could remember. Alan asked her to draw a hexagon – and she did. Next she drew a trapezoid. Alan asked her what the shape was. She looked at it carefully and said “I think it’s a trapagon.”

The kid is logical.

Today is picture day at Moira’s elementary school. She’s wearing a spiffy new outfit and we’re in the bathroom combing her hair and attempting to force her bangs to lay down instead of up on her forehead. I noticed she had some white stuff around her mouth (breakfast of some sort) and leaned down for a closer look. It was then that I noticed that she hadn’t brushed her teeth…a little morning breath action.

Me: “Honey, you need to go brush your teeth please – you need clean teeth for the picture plus it’ll give you fresh breath.”

Moira: “Do I have to?”

Me: “Yes”

Moira: “But they aren’t smell pictures!”

Alan and I were lying in bed last night. We were talking about I-don’t-remember-what. Moira comes walking in all groggy-like. I immediately figured she’d had a bad dream. Alan assumed the same thing, got up and took her in his arms and said “did you have a bad dream, honey?” She just looked at him blankly. Which is odd, because usually she is very verbose about what exactly was in her dream – monsters, spiders, lions, etc. So he asked her again…and she looked at him, laid her head back, and closed her eyes. I piped up at that point and said “Moira – are you all right?” She just looked at me with her eyes open – but in a very zoned out way. We’re both expecting her to wake up enough to tell the tale of the nightmare, but it’s not happening.

Alan looks and me asks if I think she’s sleepwalking. I said “I don’t know.” We both look at each other, then at her. Then comes the brilliant part. Alan turns to Moira and says “are you sleepwalking?” She opens her eyes very peacefully, says “yes”, then drifts back off to sleep.

Who knew you could ask sleepwalkers to confirm their sleepwalking!? And who knew they will indeed very calmly do so?!